my struggle right now isn't of belief.
i believe in God. i do.
but i'm having the hardest time putting some faith in him.
every person i've put my faith in has failed me.
and it's hard to believe that if i do it again i won't be failed again.

"i'm crooked and miguided and tired of being tired"

i am an incredibly blessed person, in every single aspect of my life.

God is good, all the time.

I need a healthy dose of perspective.

i'm happier when i am self-destructive.

fuck this.
fuck it all.
i'm so terribly tired of life.
i'm tired of trying to believe better things and having it get me nowhere.

there's no point anymore.

no good. no good.
worthless.
failure.

inadequate.